Christmas Jokes

I signed up for the role of joke master in tomorrow’s toastmaster meeting. So I have to look for a joke today. Since it is the last meeting before christmas, I would like the joke related to christmas. It is hard to find a good christmas joke, especially it has to be clean, non-religious, appeal to people from different cultureal background. When I search on the web, the same few jokes always show up in the search result, and most of them are one-liners, letters to Santa, some sort of top 10 list or funny lyrics for old christmas songs. Those jokes only funny on paper, but the laughter is lost in a speech. I then focus my search on stories about kids and Santa Claus, and christmas shopping. I have came up with a few good ones, and havn’t decide which one to use tomorrow. Here are some funny ones I came across in my search:

There are three stages in a man’s life:
He believes in Santa Claus
He doesn’t believe in Santa Clus
He becomes a Santa Claus.

When people recevied toys for christmas gifts, it usually say that batteries not included on the package. How about giving out battery as christmas gift with a note saying toys not included?

If there were three wise woman instead of three wise man. They would ask for direction and arrived on time, helped to deliver the baby, clean the stable and bought pratical gifts.

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